Living in North Wales
Amazing Auntie Gwen
It had been many years and many experiences since we first met, but Jeanette had kept in touch with me.
But something happened and our friendship was to become much stronger.
It went a bit like this...
I was sat alone, thinking. Today would be a sad day for them. Jeanette's husband Mike had died in an accident and today was the day of the funeral. I hadn't expected any correspondence after sending her the card which took me an hour to choose. The lady in the card shop was so patient with me, as always, but nothing seemed to say the right thing.
Probably because there's no right thing to say at those times in life.
We need to get away.
The telephone rang 'Is that Gwen?' The girl's voice was timid and nervous. 'Yes, who's that?' I asked 'I'm Jeanette's daughter Anna. I know this is a strange thing to ask but could my mum and Sarah and me come over to your house to stay - just for a couple of days. We just need to get away from here for a while. We need to get away.' Her voice had become stronger, more insistant.... but more afraid.
I'd not spoken to Anna since she was a toddler and now she had Sarah, a baby of her own. Within an hour I was making up the spare bedroom for Jeanette and falling over and moving my son's drumkit into the garage to make room for Sarah's travel cot so that Anna and Sarah could use his room. They were due to arrive at around 8pm and my mind was full of questions. I sat with a cup of tea waiting. Waiting. Why run to me? I wasn't even close. Surely they had friends and family in Bradford
We're in trouble
The three of them were tired and Sarah was screaming as they arrived. Funny how babies pick up their mother's feelings. Jeanette hardly spoke and I didn't press her to talk. But as Anna quietly put Sarah to bed I moved across to sit on the couch next to Jeanette. She jumped because she hadn't noticed me move to her side. I knew that this wasn't just about grief. 'What is it Jeanette?' I whispered. 'Oh Gwen we're in trouble. and we've done nothing to deserve it Gwen. Nothing at all.' 'What do you mean?' 'Mike gambled everything - everything! It's all gone and there are people he owed - people he owed a lot'.
Living in North Wales has been my only dream for the past two years.
I know it's a big thing to ask of you Gwen but coming here, living in North Wales, has been my only dream for the past two years. You've always been there for me. Always offered if there was anything I needed ...and I never really thought I'd truly need it but I do. I need it for Anna and Sarah.' Sarah had gone to sleep. The baby intercom murmered reassuringly. 'We'll only need to stay for a while.' Anna was shattered and went to bed before ten o clock. I just didn't know what to say about all this - I wasn't sure what to ask or what Jeanette was really saying to me, so me being me, after us talking about nothing much for a while, I asked her straight.
My life seems to change for the better when I've faced the challenge of South Stack and listened to the birds
'We just need some time to get ourselves together, Gwen. Get a new life here. The thoughts of a future living in North Wales has kept me going. I'd started to plan things. I didn't advertise the fact but I'd been planning to leave Mike and come here to live, but Mike is gone.' She paused and after a minute of just sitting there, the two of us silent she almost whispered 'I need to look after my family. You see I don't think it wasn't an accident Gwen. That's why we had to leave now - today. Please don't ask me too much. No one knows I have you as a connection here. We just need to get out of the way until it all calms down and people forget.' Although the room want quiet my head was banging so hard I thought it would burst. It was the thumping of my heart. I was afraid and yet I didn't know what to fear. Heart thumping and hands shaking. I didn't want to let her see I was so afraid, so I changed the subject. But I shifted from one challenge to another. I suggested if the weather allowed in the next few days that we all go over to Trearddur Bay and South Stack Lighthouse whilst they were here. I explained to Jeanette that, even though I find it quite scarry, I always find my life seems to change for the better when I've been there. I just stand out of the car at the small parking area feeling the wind on my face and listening to the birds. 'Well if you're sure, Gwen.' I replied 'Yes I'm sure' 'Ok, we'll do that' she said 'and we'll all change things for the better'
Their fear was subsiding
We all enjoyed South Stack in our own ways. Jeanette and I stayed with the car - and baby Sarah - whilst Anna walked down the steps to the lighthouse. She talked about the spectacular views and the sea spray aond the beauty of the place for weeks and weeks. I asked no more questions about Mike's death, and even though I was afraid of whatever they'd ran from, I found that after a month or so of them living here in North Wales with me, my own life certainly had changed for the better. You see I am blind. And with my son moving away two years earlier my life had gradually become what you might call very 'dark'. I'd become so lonely since David had gone to Holland to work and I hadn't wanted to admit it. And then they came along. Listening to baby Sarah gurgling and cooing, hearing the shift in the tones of Jeanette and Anna's voices as days became weeks and weeks became months was lovely. I could tell that their fear was subsiding and the pain of losing Mike came to the fore, as it should have been from the start, and then the pain became an ache and the ache became longing and there was no mention of them ever leaving. We sorted things out. Slowly.
Amazing Auntie Gwen
And all that was almost 20 years ago. And I have had the privilage of sharing life, and my home, with my friend Jeanette and her family. Baby Sarah will have her 21st birthday this year. I'm her Amazing Auntie Gwen who can name the birds in the garden from the sound of their song and their 'pecking' on the nut box - thanks to her and a great deal of patience from us both! I'm so pleased Jeanette decided that living in North Wales would give her family a better life. Friendship and families. They're everything to me.
Written by M Jones of Holyhead
